Steppinupmusic.com

Official Website of Lori Crandall

Behind the Music

Lori Crandall

People have asked me over and over what inspired me to write such heavy themed music.  I wanted to answer them all here.                                      

My whole life I've been aware of the suffering of the human race.  When I was in 7th grade, one of my classmates was brutally assulted and murdered by someone close to her that should have protected her.  I've never forgotten her face. 

Throughout my life I've "seen" people, meaning I've somehow been able to look at a person and see how they are feeling that day.  Over and over again, these people shared with me a portion of their life and the tradgedy that they were facing.

After years of hearing these stories, I decided to fight back, to fight against this horrible monster called "domestic violence".  Now I know, those two words can strike fear into people because most people know someone who has either been through it, or is going through it themselves, and frankly it is a scary subject.  But, I'm here to tell you domestic violence kills all involved, and if good people don't take a stand against it, then nothing will ever improve and people will forever be damaged from generation to generation.

Therefore, I decided to write this EP.  These songs are near and dear to my heart.

In my own life I've known the sting of abuse.  Yes, even a person like me,...strong, capable, outgoing.  ANYONE can be a victim of this filth.  See, that is the thing.  Domestic violence doesn't wear certain clothes, or cash paychecks of certain amounts every two weeks.  No, abuse is no stranger to every group of people.  It covers all socio-economical areas of life. 

Abuse can range from emotional, physical, sexual, intellectual, financial, spiritual, psychological...basically every way a human can see, think, feel or touch, a person can be damaged.

Now...seeing as how we all realize that abuse exists, I, from my own personal experience have some things I'd like to share about recovery from this abuse.

First of all, when you can be honest with yourself that the abuse actually has happened or is happening, then you are half way there.  Next when you realize that you don't deserve the abuse and that there is absolutely NOTHING you can do to change the abuser, you are another 30% there. 

The rest is protecting yourself, loving yourself and making healthy choices for yourself.

I'm not going to tell you it is easy, nope, it's not. It's the most difficult thing you may ever do in your life.  Facing yourself and your own past and demons takes guts and courage.  But I'm here to tell you that if you had what it took to survive the abuse in the first place, you've got what it takes to recover from it.  I'm living proof.  It takes time and truth, but in that comes peace, real, deep down personal peace.  I never even knew what that was until I faced my own demons.  From time to time I still find myself face to face with an old demon, but when I do I feel comforted knowing that I've faced so many before this one and I got through it, so I know I can get through this one too.

I believe we as humans are works in progress.  We are all on a journey learning at our own pace, needing to be steadied from those around us from time to time. 

I believe we can heal ourselves if we want to.  It it simply a choice.  Nothing can begin to heal, until you make the choice and be willing to walk back into your past.  Your life is yours along with the direction of it, so you must make that choice, and then, the momentum of healing and growth can begin and you will find that the courage you need to face yourself resided in you all along.  It is up to you.

Bless you all in your choices, and love yourselves. 

Lori

Lori Crandall